So close
that I could drown
in The Tamar in the attempt
in trying to reach
a buried deep home…
Too close the brightness of the day
that started out by hanging
on my doorstep
as the four in the morning Blues
threatened to send my over
active mind
into the screaming landscape
of anxiety filled possession.
The cold of autumn
on the empty dance floor of Lime Street
is briefly ignited by the warm
good morning greeting to stony Ken,
It is the long day before,
the cruel winter of bare tree thought
has plagued me since
the start of September’s fallen
and I find my reasoning
has deserted me, the fear
of your constant rejection
moulding me into the man I am.
The soulless winter
in my life, you
couldn’t touch the spring in which
you rallied against,
you ignored me,
I found it was easier
to live without you
and I told you such
when my old Queen died.
Somehow, I managed
to take a picture
of horses snorting,
their hot breath turning into steam
as they charged down the field
and towards my camera lens,
the unblinking, the hot hoof beat
that I felt underneath,
locomotive driven, terrifying
and beautiful, an attack
on the front, be still, measured
I implored myself, hold the reins
of the camera tightly, snap
shot of a time
when I went racing with James.
Ian D. Hall 2018
I never thought
that I could ever be charged
with the crime
of being an Ol’ white man.
Despite having never once
seen myself as but
an ally, a willing supporter
and cheerleader of feminism,
an enthusiast of different cultures
and romantic scholar of other’s values
a devotee of equalism…
somehow,
I am just an Ol’ white dude
who cares nothing
for anything;
I wonder what my life was for
in such moments,
I stood for all,
now, none stand with me.
I saw you,
through the haze,
the other night
whilst you were dressed in tight fitting jeans
and with the selected primrose
jumper that you always wore
when believing yourself
to be an agent provocateur,
your hand on his leg, the soft stroke
of indiscretion;
I watched without care,
for a brief moment,
till I knew the secret
of your smile,
and then forgot you,
as the haze grew clearer.
Ian D. Hall 2018.
I want to leave
another permanent mark
on my skin, to feel the pulse
under the knife today,
tonight, when it is the hour
of understanding, of dismissed life.
I watched his mouth open wide
forming a sentence as the background
of clamour threatened
with deep joy to stutter any conversation
we might have had,
I leaned my head forward, slightly,
and cupped
my empty hand to my ears as if
to show his words had been mislaid
in the pulse of ether
A lake of wood
and former taut string
gathers underneath her feet.
She plays as relics of other’s
ambition and lost gaze cause
sweeps alongside her,
the fashioned, once polished,
timber falls out of shape
and warps the water
with its sound.
As the bow glides,
ripples of echoes
float towards a distant shore
and in the dream of inspiring hope,
she plays on, each note a siren
calling out to hear the sound
of the violin serenade, to join
Can I impart
a whispered moment
of exclusive thought to you
my love?
I think
you are so very special,
so out of the ordinary.
Don’t worry,
there is no pressure,
no one will understand,
I am just going
to tell
everyone
that I meet.
Ian D. Hall 2018
Dancing Queen…
so obscene
to behave like you have licked
the cream, whipped
into a frenzy
as you embarrass us
coming to the stage
like the unhinged robot
in a disguise of self-deprecation
as its nuts and bolts come away,
come away,
come away, worked loose,
the puppet without her strings
is on the loose…
oh, may we have this dance
you believe in your head
we requested, and as you
pull another gun from out
of the bra straps, fluffy
Her fingers clicked
through the beads, one
by one, a silent prayer in progress
as the bus grunted in disjointed answer
to her hope of forgiveness and eyes
staring penance.
Her gaze never wavering from the unfolding
scene of life, horror in her mind
as I saw only animated Time.
Unseen
to me, something must have caught her eye
and slowly, with pain etched deep
in her face and a tear forming,
she put down her faith
and forfeited the remainder
of the journey, taking flight