The (Second) Extra Granted Minute.

Having recently had the pleasure of a gift

bestowed upon me, Time, albeit for a solitary

obliging minute, I found that I was not content

in how I handled it, I gave myself Time, but I didn’t

give any of it away

as I should have done

with a smile,

a handshake that was denied me by one,

and even if I cursed under my breath

and the taste of craw and carrion ticks

that scuttle around at the back

of the throat, that delight in the act of living like

tiny birds in a crocodiles mouth, I would smile

and be contrite and give me the minute in which I

took from you in which to make amends.

 

For the record that was scratched

because at the age of nine I thought

your music sucked, I know I apologised

and bought you the best of that band years later, but still

I am sorry and in granting the extra minute

I would stop and think about what was to come,

the weeks of silence from a girl I had known since I was four.

 

For the opinion you asked me for

but gave the answer

you didn’t think I would give,

I would now just shut up

and look at you in the eyes,

deep and brown,

and tell you that you already knew the answer,

it was not my place to give.

 

I would make it clear that I don’t take sides

thereby saving myself heartache,

although

the end result

of that I believe makes me despair of you

more than it does me.

 

I wouldn’t have asked you out

when I was but still a kid,

grown up but lonely,

for I know it ruined you,

you have never tired of telling me

in the following

twenty years…

 

…Time works both ways,

you needn’t have said yes.

 

I would have fought back, despite my nature

of pacifism, for on that football field I would never

have displaced your knee in sweet

untold revenge…

the snap then music to my ears.

 

I would never have agreed to leave,

old enough to stay behind,

old enough to bite my savage tongue

for the want of a minute’s brief repose.

 

All the things I have done, said badly in the heat

of pain I would not do,

however

would you have afforded me

the same injury free slights

if you had that

extra granted minute?

 

Ian D. Hall 2015