Nicola Hardman cuts an impressive, unique figure as she sits opposite me in the Garden Café at F.A.C.T. The young musician/actor has been busy recording some new music and her latest song, Little Fish, is a tremendous listen. It is one of those songs where underneath the sound of a catchy tune, wriggles the idea that there is so much going on under the surface, so much unseen, that like all interesting people, those with so much to tell, you cannot but want to meet them and try and find out more.
The café is on the quiet side, not unusual for first thing in the morning and it helps to hear Nicola in her own words, to see that wonderful uniqueness come out and not be drowned by the sound of throbbing existence that can sometimes happen when such meetings take place. Ahead of her set at the Tattoo Convention at the Adelphi on the 17th May, I ask Nicola,
You don’t record under your own name, do you?
NH: “No, I don’t, well a little bit! My actual name is Smith and it’s so common, it’s like muck so I use Hardman because it’s easier and it’s part of my family anyway.”
That’s interesting because some people feel that changing a name, changes some aspects of their music or their attitudes.
NH: “No I mean, it was literally just after university, after I graduated, I had to have a performing name for acting and for Equity and stuff like that, so as I said since Smith was just so common, Hardman was good.”
How did you get into the music side of things?
NH: “I’ve always been a musician. Initially, I’ve always played music; since the age of seven. I remember watching the film Amadeus (with Tom Hulse as Mozart) one day and I loved it so much. I thought; I want to be him! I’ve never had such an overwhelming sense to want to be someone. So I asked for piano lessons and I was lucky that my parents were able to give me them. I’ve never really looked back since then. I love music, it’s my core.”
That just shows your soul!
NH: “Do you think so, why?”
I think I said something about this in the review. There’s an element of seen creativity within it, the heartbeat at the start of it. It’s that creative institution between the heart and the brain.
NH: “That’s a nice way of looking at it. That’s lovely to hear! This piece was made because I had a friend who was in a really awful situation. I was thinking about it and I was staying at a friend’s at the time; The friend wasn’t the one in the situation I’m talking about , but anyway he had gone to sign on for Job Seekers Allowance (he’s a writer) and he’d left me in his house. And I thought; what the Hell am I going to do? I had these thoughts going around my head about my friend who was in this situation, so I sat down at his keyboard, and I started playing this sad waltz which eventually turned out to be Little Fish. But a lot of my work either comes from a situation like that or dreams. As I dream every night, I like to remember them because usually they are awful or great, they are very explicit!”
Do you subscribe to the dream theory of dreams persuading outcomes then?
NH: “I do in a way. I’m quite a spiritual person without actually being religious or anything like that but I do have a sense of universal stuff and I like to think that dreams are a lot about what we are in life and that they probably do subconsciously affect us.”
There is a dreamlike quality to your music which does come through and it’s interesting to hear from you saying about Amadeus and all that as a lot of his music has a dreamlike quality too.
NH: “I guess it does, I think I’ve always been just an arty farty type of person from being very young and I love involving dreams in stuff. I like it in my acting as well; I’m very into experimental theatre and Jungian dream psychology stuff – I’m not going to sit here though and talk about it for ages but it’s a very fine basis, I like those ideas.”
You work with a band, do your own music and what about your acting? If you had to choose between the three, where would you go?
NH: “Between acting, music and collaborations? My God! If I had to choose I don’t know, I can’t. They are all very different experiences for me; they just bring out different sides to me.”
How important is the acting to you?
NH: “I love it. If I had to choose between acting and music right now I would have to choose music because it is my core and I can’t help that, but I find it very difficult to separate the two which is why I even tend to write very dramatically – Little Fish is quite a dramatic song but I have other songs which are mega-cheesey sort of probably normal pop songs. I do find it very difficult to separate the two because I feel I’m an interdisciplinary artist.”
It’s very unique you’re using your acting, I know others who do it, you seem to have a wonderful sense of proportion to it, if that makes any sense? Like for example, Lizzie Nunnery who does writing, acting and poetry – there’s a slot for each and it comes across in you as well.
NH: “I’m glad as well, it’s very difficult. I remember my university tutor, she was a wonderful woman, saying at the end of my showcase in Manchester when I was 19, Nicola, you’re going to have to clearly separate what you do; you are going to have to focus on one thing at a time. I didn’t know what she meant then, but I understand now – the shit hits the fan if you don’t know what you’re doing. It’s very easy to become lost and overwhelmed by stuff; which has happened to me. I guess it was nearing the end of the seven years that I’d been on tour constantly with different companies and theatres with these little small gaps in between working in cafes and working on these projects. I got to a point where I was being overwhelmed by everything – like what am I going to do next, what’s going to happen and it sort of affected my personal life. I had a bit of a crisis back in 2012/2013 and I feel like I’m coming out the other side now and I can take a step back and think; I want to do this now.”
Does being an artist help you see the other side and get through the hard times in an easier way compared to say someone who is very science-based and who uses logic to get through life?
NH: “I guess to an extent, it’s probably 50/50 it depends very much on who you are as a person because for me, it’s taken a very long time to be able to think logically, I’ve had to learn that which sounds ridiculous but you do have to step back and use your brain and not your heart sometimes, which sounds very airy-fairy but it is an actual thing that you have to do, what I’ve had to do.”
Congratulations again on Little Fish it’s a lovely song, I’ve raved about it – what’s next?
NH: “I’d like to release it digitally which is what I’m working on now and I guess I’d like to eventually write an album. There’s lots of things in the pipeline but at the moment, I’m feeling really creative and really good so I just want to gig as much as possible. I’d love to do a U.K. tour and just get a van and go and take some people on the road. I’d like to write an album, and a concept album – that would be awesome, I’d love to do that but I just want to be performing live as much as possible as I feel that’s been really held back.”
I might be going off on a tangent here but you mentioned a concept album – does that mean you’re a little bit progressive? Going back to Amadeus and the times that he was living in, he could have been thought of as being progressive. It shows in your music as well.
NH: “That’s a real compliment, that’s nice, thank you.”
No, I mean it you can hear elements of progressive rock and pop interwoven between all your songs.
NH: “I would like to think that, there are so many amazing musicians out there. When I go out and play, there are so many amazing people. It’s so easy to think; do I fit in here, what am I? You just have to do your own thing I guess and that’s the main thing.”
One last question if I may, you’re playing at the Liverpool Tattoo Convention?
NH: “Yes, it’s on the 17th of May at the Adelphi Hotel, I can’t wait, I’m absolutely honoured to do that gig, it’s going to be somewhere where I’ll get on with so many people and it’s just because it’s a big convention and I’m really excited to play. The woman who’s asked me to play has seen me perform already so I’m going into a friendly atmosphere which is nice.”
Ian D. Hall